Thirty years ago I was suffering from eating disorders. My life was dictated by food: I had huge binges that would last for days in a row. They would be interrupted only by fasting completely. My life was a roller coaster. I felt so lonely, isolated and ashamed of myself.
In my drawings I lived a parallel life. In that ‘reality’ I was supported by a huge circus tribe, nurtured by them and fully loved. My life was an adventure. When I look at the art I can feel the strength of my mind. I found a healing device, a vehicle that carried me through the deepest despair.
It makes me smile: there is no such thing as loss, our life is always rich if we are willing to see it.
Feel free to check my exhibit out at the Lake view library in Madison.
new experiences April 4, 2015
After a yoga class I had a cup of tea in the lobby. There was a message on the cup. It said: ‘If you want something you’ve never had, you must be willing to do something you’ve never done’ -Thomas Jefferson.
I loved it. It is such a simple concept, brilliant.
I looked in my life for the places of lack in my life. I could receive more income, cash flow. I could improve on self care, more time alone to meditate and to practice my own personal yoga at home.
Both places of lack urged me to step up in my life and to create space and a willingness to create and to receive.
I immediately knew that I had to let go of my main job and to invite in a creative vision of myself as an artist and a healer.
When I took the action step and I gave notice for my job, it immediately brought me in a brand new experience of myself. There was trust in the letting go. I felt so happy and taken care of.
This was ‘the something’ I’ve never had: trust and excitement about my new life, without needing the confirmation that the new experience was in place.
And this was my willingness to do something I had never done. Jumping in the big ocean, trusting the process of life that when I close a door, other doors will open. Maybe not exactly in my timing, but for sure in harmony with the universe.
I could feel the ground strongly supporting me, I could hear the birds sing outside of my window and I thoroughly enjoyed the memory of home that, that lovely sound awakened in me.
Thanks, Thomas Jefferson!
springtime March 8, 2015
Today my house mates and me played Frisbee on the lake. I was in my gumboots, splashing around in the water on the ice. The sun was bright, it was intoxicating. people and dogs were everywhere enjoying each others company.
celebrating the elements: sun, snow, ice, water and little patches of the dark earth becoming visible.
March in Wisconsin is a treat for me, to hear the dripping sounds of water everywhere, to come out of my house in a sweater and to embrace movement and the gentle air.
In yoga there is an invitation to explore back bends, heart opening, nurturing poses for the lunges. And at the same time to find grounding and stability in all this change!
self love February 15, 2015
Yoga is my journey in Life.
Practicing yoga is a gift, it is being entirely generous to me.
It has given me ground to stand on and to build on. I feel secure and held, where before I felt insecure and lonely. I belong to the earth now. I am her child.
I can breath with ease and this connects me to my world: my daughter, my work, nature, my community. Through my relationship with breath I receive new eyes that can see with love.
Steadiness in my thoughts and feelings help me to stay open and vulnerable. I am not afraid to get hurt because every single experience is my path, my opportunity to extend who I am.
My mat and my body. Thanks for the simplicity of Yoga, it is there for me, always, no fail.
In my seated practice I feel showered with energy and love.
The Tree pose June 14, 2011
patience and confidence.
Both virtues I need to practice and I feel so blessed that this is so accessible in Yoga.
I need to balance a lot in my life and I often feel like I am working in a circus, juggling parenthood, work, studies, yoga practice, friendship, playing, shopping and cooking.
Yoga helps me to stay graceful in the process and not to freeze up. Tree pose is so calming and mind opening for me, I simply am present. On the picture I am practicing at the magnificent Wisconsin river.